Do you think online relationships can really work?

I have met a few people on line who have fallen in love with thier mates over the internet and traveled damn near half the world to be together. So I know it can work. Some of my friends are the proof. And I have seen friends come back home heartbroken as well. Do you think online relationships can really work? And why?

I'd say "Yes"
I think the pro's out weigh the con's in my eyes.

I'd say no

You can't know for sure for sure who a person really is until you meet him/her in real everyday life.

I'd take as examle how a whole forum community was convinced I was some big badie and now thinks I'm a softy (They're not getting it right either )

Well obviously i will say it can work, as I have met Aleksandra and it is even better now.
It works if the following four criteria will be met. 1. love, of course. 2. communication and determination. 3. last but not least, plans to meet in a reasonable future and on regular basis.
Of course Aleksandra is not far from me now and when she returns in Slovenia she will be an hour away from me only by plane, so it can definitely work. However, many people think that they have a relationships but have not made any plans to meet, which in that case will lead to a disaster.
It is also true that when some people meet, it is not the same, and this is because some people behave differently when they are online.
So, I will conclude by saying that it is never 100 yes, or 100 % no for the answer to this question. But then, is it not the same with relationships which start offline?
My previous marriage being a vivid example of failure.
So, I believe there are no standards. I had not expected what happened with Aleksandra but then, we both knew that we would meet soon even as just friends as she was coming here anyway.
So maybe our case is a bit different. Also, she has made definite plans for the future as she intends to work here anyway.
So maybe our case doesn't meet the standards of the usual online relationships, which now we have to call it differently.
Now, let's be clear. If one is for instance in the US and the other in Australia, they might meet. But then it will be once, and will they meet once a year? And in that case it will certainly not be enough to maintain a relationship. Once you have met, the online thing will no longer work sufficiently. Very interesting topic actually as it is more and more a habit lately.cheers. john

They can, but in most cases don't.

Caihlem wrote:

I'd say no

You can't know for sure for sure who a person really is until you meet him/her in real everyday life.

I'd take as examle how a whole forum community was convinced I was some big badie and now thinks I'm a softy (They're not getting it right either )

Ok so maybe you're not a sofie, but behind that Big Bad Exterior lies a really great guy under there. I guess he just peeks out ever so often, sneakcretly. But I peeped him, for a millasecond. lol I know , Caihlem's a Sweety * Pokes You * He just likes to hide it some times, It's true!

Oooh and Booo for voting No. lol

record4 wrote:

They can, but in most cases don't.

They can Gus, Look at Nemo and Denise. Now thats a love story right there don't you think?

Le Comte de Monte-Cristo wrote:

Well obviously i will say it can work, as I have met Aleksandra and it is even better now.
It works if the following four criteria will be met. 1. love, of course. 2. communication and determination. 3. last but not least, plans to meet in a reasonable future and on regular basis.
Of course Aleksandra is not far from me now and when she returns in Slovenia she will be an hour away from me only by plane, so it can definitely work. However, many people think that they have a relationships but have not made any plans to meet, which in that case will lead to a disaster.
It is also true that when some people meet, it is not the same, and this is because some people behave differently when they are online.
So, I will conclude by saying that it is never 100 yes, or 100 % no for the answer to this question. But then, is it not the same with relationships which start offline?
My previous marriage being a vivid example of failure.
So, I believe there are no standards. I had not expected what happened with Aleksandra but then, we both knew that we would meet soon even as just friends as she was coming here anyway.
So maybe our case is a bit different. Also, she has made definite plans for the future as she intends to work here anyway.
So maybe our case doesn't meet the standards of the usual online relationships, which now we have to call it differently.
Now, let's be clear. If one is for instance in the US and the other in Australia, they might meet. But then it will be once, and will they meet once a year? And in that case it will certainly not be enough to maintain a relationship. Once you have met, the online thing will no longer work sufficiently. Very interesting topic actually as it is more and more a habit lately.cheers. john

I agree nothing in life is 100% gaurenteed to work , but I believe you can fall in love online, easily. If its real love and you meet and it works. It's a beautiful thing. I have 2 friends that fell in love on line one from the netherlands and one from Austraila. Just the cutest couple ever really, they met and 30 days later they were married and I couldn't be happier for them. Love works, sometimes.

And I hope only for the best for you and Aleksandra, John. Hugs.

Like I said they can, but in most cases don't

Hmm ok granted, Chelsea and Kai, remember? The whole canada thing.. Oh yeah. I think he still loves her tho.

Ooh Gus, Ok Glen and Samantha worked. Alot do work tho *pouts*

I voted maybe since I think they might work but it all depends of the partners that are involved in the relationship.

Yes Luky, that makes sense. And don't forget what I said above. Four criteria must be met. But I have seen many relationships working though. I havealso seen many failing, and this because of the absence of actual plans to meet. Now, i should have addeed a fifth. And it should have been honesty. Indeed, if one will behave oline and hide behind a mask, the physiocal meeting, is bound to be rather painful to the other.
Well, as my experience shows, both of us trusted each other and were honest, and also take into account that we are both blind s appearances don't really matter tous. Therefore, when we met on Friday evening, we didn't look like strangers, and things went as they should. Undoubtedly, we feel closer now that we met and spent time together, because, of course, nothing replaces that. To those who vote no, and i respect every opinion of course, I would say, perhaps you should not be so extreme. And to those who vote yes, in which i am included, I say yes, if we meet the above mentioned conditions. Do all offline relationships work? far from it. So you see it is to be taken relatively, and not complete yesor complete no.
Like relationships that start off line, those that start online will work or fail. The concept being different, it also gives another dimension to the issue, hence the questions about it working or not. But if you look at things a bit closer, you will find that a lot of people, offline, see a girl and immediately want her for sex only, no love being involved even if that play love in order to win her.
Visual attraction, giving birth to a desire which is many tie mistaken for love. But we must remember that in any case, love comes from the heart.
So even online, especially by voice chat, after a while you can get to know some one pretty much.
Then your heart will feel, or not feel, the love in question.
Suppose you see the sexiest girl in the world, and she will give youall the sex you wish but then, her heart is abominable, you still have got nothing that lasts. So I will say, online reltionships may work, just like the others, if those conditions are met.
If however, one of the two parties will be lying and be dishonest, doing the same thing with a few girls at the same time, well, then we're not talking of love. For a cheat can't be loved or even feel loved as only the personality that they will show will be loved.
Let's therefore rememberthat when we talk of relationships, we must consider the honest ones, not th cheats. Then yes, it works. John

if you do it right yes. you have to be carefull about who you talk to, abdd i also think the questions asked by the person will kind of indicate what there intentions are.

Yes, Daniel, you are correct. Unfortunately, i am sorry to observe that some people ly in answering the questions you are talking about, and that is where we have to be careful.
I now rust Aleksandra completely, but she had to work hard to have my total trust, because I have been burnt more than once.
Now, our relationship is no longer the same, it is offline for the most part, but I'm sure you will remember some events from last year mate, where I have been badly hurt.
Aleksandra knew it all of course, and acted accordingly, patiently showing me that she could be trusted, ad when we met, she showed it even better.
But that's her, although I admit to be somewhat partial when it comes to her, asI love her.
Incidentally we will again be together this weekend. We might go out, and as the ;kids will be with their mother, it will mean that we can be flexible as far as timing and all that. Cheers. John

record4 wrote:

They can, but in most cases don't.

I completely agree. Speaking from my own personal experience I'd say no, but I really can't speak for anyone else.

Id say no, i met a few people online and it
was nothing but disappointment.

I have heard alot of sad stories 2 gurly. It is a major let down when things don't work out as expected sometimes.

Yeah, most men dont know how to treat women offline,
so they only go for the online ones.

I don't believe in "Online Relationships at all. There are to many tangibles and intangible's that go into finding a relationship. You can't determine a persons personality over the internet or over the phone. I mean I think its just crazy. I've been with my girlfriend for over a year now and we are learning something about each other all the time still. You never know if theses people are crazy or just looking for a one night stand. Look at all the grown men that are are caught on that show "Date Line". There are just to many risks to take with doing Online Dating.

I mean if we are adults tell our younger siblings and children not to talk to strangers because of the danger it in tells, then why would someone give the chance to maybe take advantage of a person with lesser capability of defending themselves maybe.

In my opinion something like this is just to hard to say weather or not its good or bad. I don't have a problem with people that do online dating but it definitely makes me question what matters to them the most. Being safe or being patient and waiting on the right thing or person to come along.

Thats just my two centsss

thats why i have dogs

DC wrote:

I don't believe in "Online Relationships at all. There are to many tangibles and intangible's that go into finding a relationship. You can't determine a persons personality over the internet or over the phone. I mean I think its just crazy. I've been with my girlfriend for over a year now and we are learning something about each other all the time still. You never know if theses people are crazy or just looking for a one night stand. Look at all the grown men that are are caught on that show "Date Line". There are just to many risks to take with doing Online Dating.

I mean if we are adults tell our younger siblings and children not to talk to strangers because of the danger it in tells, then why would someone give the chance to maybe take advantage of a person with lesser capability of defending themselves maybe.

In my opinion something like this is just to hard to say weather or not its good or bad. I don't have a problem with people that do online dating but it definitely makes me question what matters to them the most. Being safe or being patient and waiting on the right thing or person to come along.

Thats just my two centsss

You can be with someone for eight years and be married and
still not know what makes that person tick, you either want someone
or you dont, plain and simple, dateline is online predators of stalking
young boys and girls, big difference.

I say follow your heart, it always knows the way

justanothergirlyo wrote:

DC wrote:

I don't believe in "Online Relationships at all. There are to many tangibles and intangible's that go into finding a relationship. You can't determine a persons personality over the internet or over the phone. I mean I think its just crazy. I've been with my girlfriend for over a year now and we are learning something about each other all the time still. You never know if theses people are crazy or just looking for a one night stand. Look at all the grown men that are are caught on that show "Date Line". There are just to many risks to take with doing Online Dating.

I mean if we are adults tell our younger siblings and children not to talk to strangers because of the danger it in tells, then why would someone give the chance to maybe take advantage of a person with lesser capability of defending themselves maybe.

In my opinion something like this is just to hard to say weather or not its good or bad. I don't have a problem with people that do online dating but it definitely makes me question what matters to them the most. Being safe or being patient and waiting on the right thing or person to come along.

Thats just my two centsss

You can be with someone for eight years and be married and
still not know what makes that person tick, you either want someone
or you dont, plain and simple, dateline is online predators of stalking
young boys and girls, big difference.

I say follow your heart, it always knows the way

Yeah I know was Dateline is. I was just making a reference for the sick people that are out there. Weather they attack those of younger age, or even adults

I agree with Yolanda, Follow your Heart , but again Drew has a point about all the sicko's there are in the world as well. We live everyday by taking chances, without ever realizing it, we could die today. Life is to short to zero out online friendships in my eyes as potential lifetime relationships. I think its possible and I think people have a better chance of meeting some one online, getting to know them 1st and then dating afterwards.
In NY I have a friend who does this 5 minute dating thing where she meets at a certain bar and does these 5 minute interviews with multiple guys. Then decides who she'd like to date. To me thats wayy more dangerous a dating game then dating online I think, don't you?

Sounds like it Nessa, a five minute dating question and answer session. I wouldnt even waste my time. Getting to know someone, talking and never running out of conversation, meeting up and having a super time face to face, being there for each other on the good and bad days. Thats the kind of friendships that hopefully come out of spending time online. Communication is the key whether its online or offline.

If the two can laugh and cry together, its always a good start.
[and it helps if they are a good cook]